A Slam-sational Site Announcement!

GEAR

Administrator
Staff member
Jun 15, 2018
772
0
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#1
Greetings, denizens of the IgNation!

As you know, we are in a period of tumult.

Of course, that means this is the perfect excu-I mean, opportunity to once again revisit our core values, and ask ourselves what the future holds.

One year ago, after the slew of death threats and supply shortage of size XL frilly dresses, it was unfortunate that we had to cancel Super Idol Wars: Ignite My Heart less than 20 minutes after its ambitious launch. Truly, it was wasted on you philistines too far ahead of its time.

However, in our continual effort to deliver the ultimate roleplaying experience, we remain uncompromising! Whether it be in the face of worldwide pandemics, economic instability, or Einst invasions, you can rely on our talented staff team to continue to deliver for you!

That is why I have not consulted with any of them before this amazing announcement:

Starting today, SRW Ignition will be rebranded as the "Inter(galactic) Wrestling (Association('s)) (Department (of) Sales) TM", informally known as Super Wrestling Wars SLAMNATION!


Yes, starting with the arrival of the Mecha Macho Man*, Intergalactic Heavyweight Champion and Honorary Shura-O to Artemis, our players will have the exciting, and indeed mandatory pleasure of entering the thrilling world of professional wrestling! Reach for the brass ring as you compete within the company to go over with the crowds, sell merchandise instead of finishers, and finally reach the venerated heights of Hollywood stardom!

Here are some of the changes you can expect:

-Faction affiliations will be replaced with "Face" or "Heel" designations.
-Thread outcomes will now be determined by staff assigned "booker", Kujo. Please congratulate him, as he was not aware of this arrangement!
-All finishing moves will have to be done off a top rope. Some of you will have an easier time adjusting to this than others.
-R-18 rated Orgone energy will be replaced with the wholesome, reliable power of eating your vitamins, and saying your prayers.
-Mandatory classes will be held on cutting promos, hosted by our very own Zeonguy!

While this may entail a period of adjustment, I am certain you will come to love the spectacle of the male soap opera as much as I do. I look forward to seeing everyone embrace this change in the spirit of our continued growth. Here's to another SLAM-tastic year!

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OHHHHHHH YEEAAAAAAAAHHHHH!

-Your Admin team.

*Negotiations with Slim Jims for a sponsorship are ongoing.
Special thanks to Kujo for the logo!